Going in

As I look out my window, the snow is falling and it’s soooo freezing. All I want to do is get under a blanket, watch a movie and sleep. It was just New Year’s and all that “gotta make it happen” energy feels long gone.

You have to wonder… it’s kinda hard to set active goals when our bodies just want to curl up, hibernate, and devour an entire batch of chocolate chip cookies. It leads to the question – is it normal the way we constantly push to do and race to achieve? And on top of that… why do so many of us feel guilty if we aren’t being, “productive”?

10 years ago this month, I was diagnosed with rheumatoid arthritis. I share that here for the simple reason that at the time, I was running like a madwoman on the hamster wheel, trying to be all things to all people. I ran every school committee, went to book clubs and parenting groups, taught classes at night to teenage girls – all while raising four kids and doing my damndest to keep it together.

Well, at least I thought I was keeping it all together. But quite suddenly, I was forced to stop. Everything. The stiffness and achiness in my joints made the decision for me. But even stronger, was the crushing fatigue that insisted I slow down and be still.

I had to learn to say no. To cancel plans even when I was embarrassed to do so. To rest when I wanted to rush. The couch became my best friend, cheerfully greeting me at 3pm as I begrudgingly allowed for this new me.

I had no choice and was hard on myself until I surrendered and recognized what my body was teaching me.

I needed to rest! We all need to rest! To heal. To relax and calm our systems.

I know, I know. How do we possibly find the time to rest when we have lists to check off and things to get done? Yet, for many of us, our bodies, minds and souls are screaming for us to pause. To just breathe.

For me, the imbalance in my life mirrored back to me the imbalance in my body and I learned the important lesson of honoring that truth. I hope you can learn to honor what your body is trying to tell you, as well.

This month, as you pick through your laundry pile of resolutions, be kind to yourself and know that everything happens when it is meant to happen. Give yourself permission to relax, to do nothing, and simply pet your dog or sit with that cup of tea a bit longer, or read the book that’s been sitting there.

Or just take a big fat nap when you can and sleep as I did – for many, many afternoons… its about honoring the seasons, listening to your body, and quieting the noise outside. It's about GOING IN.

And if that urge to get up and go does not appear, remember that before you know it, the crocuses and daffodils will be popping up, as the warm sun beckons you outside once more.